Goodbye
by misty23y
Summary: One shot. On a sunny day Ranger must say goodbye to one important woman in his life as he reflects upon her life and his regrets. Character death.


**Disclaimer: Anything familiar belongs to JE.**

 **Warning: Character death**

 **Goodbye**

 **Ranger's POV**

The sun is mocking us today. There is nothing sunny about today, a day that I must watch her being buried, her coffin being lowered into the earth. I wasn't on time. I couldn't get to her in time to say goodbye. I thought about the last time I saw her. It was two weeks ago. I'd just gotten back from a mission. I heard that she needed wheels. The car that she purchased got flooded in a bad rainstorm, and she couldn't afford a new one. So I purchased her a Cayenne. It was a safe car; she deserved the luxury vehicle. I could rest easy knowing that her car was safe. The look on her face when I handed her the keys was priceless. Her eyes twinkled, her mouth broke into a huge grin, and she threw her arms around my neck, thanking me for being so good to her.

Now, she's gone; the result of an asshole who decided that he could still drive after drinking a twelve pack. She was on her way home from a night out with the girls. She was the designated driver, no drinking for her. Not that she drank much anyway; she would get drunk off one beer. But she enjoyed dancing and being out with her friends. She dropped off her sister at her house before heading home. Her sister offered her a room to stay for the night, but being stubborn, she wanted to get home, to sleep in her bed. Not even ten minutes later, her car was hit head-on. There was nothing she could do to avoid the collision.

The paramedics arrived quickly, taking her to the emergency room within twenty minutes of impact, but she was brain dead upon arrival, with her heart barely beating. They were losing her fast, and nothing they could do to prevent it. I received the phone call at 0215. I never ran out of my apartment so fast. I made it to the hospital within ten minutes of the call, which was a feat considering the hospital is 25 minutes away.

I ran into the ER, hoping to at least get to hold her hand one last time, to tell her that I loved her, that I was sorry for pushing her away, that I was glad that she was part of my life, but I was too late. She passed away two minutes before I arrived. I walked out of her room dumbfounded, numb, not knowing what to do. I saw her mother, sobbing into her husband's arms as they both mourned the loss of their daughter. I saw her grandmother, leaning on her sister for support. I was an unwanted spectator to the grief. Her friends arrived a few minutes later, and the crying started more earnestly. I had to get out of there.

I walked out of the hospital and jumped back into my Turbo. I started driving, not even realizing what my destination was, the beach. She would often come here to the beach to think, to sort out her life, to figure out what to do next. She never knew that the beach is my refuge as well. I began to think back to our time together, how our relationship changed for the better after the Scrog incident. How I decided to walk into that apartment, unarmed, to save both of my girls. Now, I was burying one of them.

I always thought that it would be someone from my past who would come back and destroy what I hold dear, never thinking that it could be some random act that would turn my world upside down. In the end, it wasn't a stalker or some other crazy who fixated themselves on her; it was a drunk driver, a dumb kid who shouldn't have been driving that night.

I'm at the cemetery with the rest of her family and friends. I feel like an outsider looking in. Her mother and father are huddled together with their other daughter, sharing their grief. Her friends are sobbing, not understanding why she's gone. My men are around, standing in disbelief that she could be gone, that we couldn't protect her. I'm standing here alone in my grief, in my agony, with no one to console me, to help me with my loss. The priest finishes his graveside service so everyone can now start to leave. Her parents, grandmother, and sister get up and tentatively walk to the coffin, throwing their red roses on top. Her other family follows, throwing pink roses, then her friends and acquaintances with their white roses. My men are the last to move forward, throwing yellow roses on her coffin. Lester walks to me, putting his hand on my shoulder. "You know it wasn't your fault, Ranger. There was nothing you could have done to prevent this tragedy."

"No, but I could have been part of her life much sooner. I'll have to live with that regret that I missed so much time that we could have had together."

"Are you going back to her parent's house?"

"Yes, I'll show up for a few minutes. It's only proper. I need to be alone with her for a little while. I'm okay. I promise I won't do anything stupid."

Lester gave me another manly hug then walked away, leaving me alone with my thoughts. Images from her life flashed before my eyes. I couldn't help but smile at remembering how she always looked after getting a gift from me. I remember the look she gave me when I told her she needed to go to a safe house. If looks could kill, I would've been dead. But instead, she's dead, and I'm alive. Dios! Why did you take her from me? I hear the faint sound of footsteps. They're light steps, not a threat. I get a tingling at the base of my neck. Babe! How did she get here?

"Carlos, are you okay?" My Babe asks as she wraps her arms around my waist from behind, resting her head against my back.

"I am now, Querida," I respond, pulling her, so she's in front of me. I lean down and kiss her lips. "What are you doing here? The doctor didn't want you flying now that your 30 weeks pregnant."

"I came here with Hector; we took the train. I was able to get up and walk around whenever I needed, not to mention pee a million times."

I absent-mindedly rub her bump, where our child is growing, our daughter. "I know we originally agreed on Isabella Marie, but do you think we could name her Isabella Julie instead? I want a piece of her to live on."

"Of course, Carlos, I think Julie would have loved that. Are you ready to go to Rachel's house?"

"Yes. I was going to head straight to the airport, but now that you're here, I can face everyone."

"We are in it together, in good times and in bad times. Remember our vows." She reminds me.

"I'm glad Miami had that computer glitch. If they didn't, I would have been in Trenton when I got the call." I tell my beautiful wife.

"I know. God works in mysterious ways, but I know that Julie knows how much you loved her."

"I'm regretting giving her up."

"Carlos, you did what was right for you and Julie at that time. I know if you would have been older, things would have been different, and Julie knew that too. We talked about that a few times. She said she was glad that our daughter would have you from birth because you are a wonderful man and father. She was glad that she finally got to know you."

I take one last look at her coffin, before walking over and placing my black rose on top. "Te quiero, mi hija, siempre y para siempre," I say to her before Stephanie tosses two pink roses.

"I love you too, Julie. Watch over your brother, make sure he's safe. Until we meet again, my love." Stephanie says.

"Her brother?"

"The baby we lost, Carlos. He's with his sister now. She was called to take care of him for us."

Eighteen months ago Stephanie was pregnant with twins. One twin died in the womb, and his brother was born fine. We were crushed, but having one son was better than no son. We never knew why he died. Our second child is such a blessing, I want nothing to happen to her. Stephanie is delivering via c-section, and she's already decided to have her tubes tied. We couldn't risk another loss, especially not after Julie. I hold my Babe close to me while she composes herself before we walk hand in hand to my car, to celebrate the life Julie lived.


End file.
